navigating solo retirement after loss

[capt alex]

My dad is going through a rough time. He and Mom spent the last 10 years planning their perfect retirement, and they finally fully moved into their snowbird life a month ago. Mom passed away last week.

Now Dad is totally adrift. Their whole plan was an 'us' plan, and now he has no idea how to make an individual plan.
He has two homes, one in Florida (where Mom wanted to be, he's not sure about it now) and one in Michigan (where they raised us, my bro & I live here now).

He has no obligations except helping my college senior brother finish school (which will be delayed a semester).
He’s thinking, is it better to return to the comfort of familiarity (Michigan, where you have history), even if the weather/house isn't ideal, or seek a new, fresh community (Florida) where everything isn't a reminder of your loss?

For those who have seen a parent go through this, what was the best advice? How did they find a new circle of friends and interests when the central figure in their life was gone?
What activities can I suggest to help him fill his time?

 

[Kozak.mr]

Went through something similar with my dad after my mom passed, and the biggest turning point was giving him space to figure out his rhythm and not just pick up where they left off. Familiar surroundings helped at first, yunno like old friends, familiar routines, he joined small community groups and volunteering and I think that had the most effect

 

[Maryb3th]

@capt alex hat’s a tough spot actually, and it’s good he’s got you looking out for him and I do completely agree with @Kozak.mr Florida might be better down the line, but Michigan could give him the support network he needs right now

 

[FrugalLyf]

My dad is going through a rough time. He and Mom spent the last 10 years planning their perfect retirement, and they finally fully moved into their snowbird life a month ago. Mom passed away last week.

Now Dad is totally adrift. Their whole plan was an 'us' plan, and now he has no idea how to make an individual plan.
He has two homes, one in Florida (where Mom wanted to be, he's not sure about it now) and one in Michigan (where they raised us, my bro & I live here now).

He has no obligations except helping my college senior brother finish school (which will be delayed a semester).
He’s thinking, is it better to return to the comfort of familiarity (Michigan, where you have history), even if the weather/house isn't ideal, or seek a new, fresh community (Florida) where everything isn't a reminder of your loss?

For those who have seen a parent go through this, what was the best advice? How did they find a new circle of friends and interests when the central figure in their life was gone?
What activities can I suggest to help him fill his time?

This is heartbreaking, and I am so sorry for your family’s loss!
I think it would also be good for him to go on a sabbatical from decision-making.
A month into grief is no time for major life choices about houses or states. He's adrift in shock, and that's completely normal.
Tell him he has permission to just exist for a while and just keep both places secure for months.
For now, he should simply stay wherever he feels safest and closest to your support.
Michigan, with you and your brother, is usually the right answer early on, like the others here suggested.
Later on, it would be good to engage in new activities.
You can encourage him to volunteer for a cause he cares about, which provides instant purpose and a social circle.
He can also create a "third place" by becoming a regular somewhere, like at the gym or the same coffee shop, where he can form new friendships.
You might also want to suggest that he gets into grief counseling. It can be incredibly helpful during this transition.